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Don’t know if my brain can handle that right now.
Simple plots with happy endings.

"Somewhat sane" 🤣

Though, compared to Mr F and I...

It’s a sliding scale most days…
Slide like a trombone glissando or a Hawaiian lap guitar?
Have you been wandering through the streets or hills with that mandolin?
No, but I have been driving Mrs A to distraction by repetitive practice of few melodies.
Ask her if this is better than practicing nursery school songs on the bongos or a toy piano. 😉
I already know the answer she will give...

Are you expecting a toy piano or bongos for Christmas?

Among other things, I happen to have a fiddle and a child-sized viola that I had bought between 5 and 10 years ago. They are LOUD unless the bow is used very gently.

I don't think she'll tolerate more instruments of any size.
Not even the world's tiniest violin? Sigh... How does she manage to keep you?
I think you both need a drum set for Christmas. That will really shake things up.
I have no drums, but I have a two octave MIDI keyboard and lots of voices that include many kinds of drums and other percussion instruments. Oops. I lied. I just remembered that there is a pair of bongos in my closet, on a chrome stand.
Actually, I do have a drum - a hand held, roughly made folk type item, The sort you might use to aid you on your way in a dreamquest...
Is it a frame drum like a bodhran? I've one of those somewhere too, probably in the attic.
Generally similar, I think. I'll take a picture in the next day or so and post it.
I’ve always wanted a xylophone. That would drive people up the wall.
Most instruments do when you are not the one practicing.
Someone practicing the same part of a piece on the piano…. 😣
Ah – but a raw learner practicing...
Once in a while the church across the street has a funeral with a piper, playing outdoors on the steps while the mourners are inside.
Unfortunate...
Bagpipes at a funeral get me every time. Something I've seen in films & on the news.
Taps? Sorry, to my UK ear you appear to refer to the things you turn on to get water...?
@Simon J Ashcroft
The man in the park was quite adept, he was no beginner, so…. Raw beginner 😣

Ah! American buglers.

Not to be confused with either American burglars or American bunglers.

They exist elsewhere...