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Guy boarding the #NYC subway blasting music on a portable speaker: “As you are ignoring me, I’m ignoring you twice.”

He ended up lowering his volume and even striking up conversations with a few riders, which is utterly incomprehensible to me after the passive-aggressive start.
#NYC

Lofenyy (moved) reshared this.

Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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You have no idea how much I'm trying to resist entering 'armchair psychologist' mode...
Hypolite Petovan
Hypolite Petovan  
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I've seen your armchair, I trust its psychology credentials, please report what it said about this event.
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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First thing I thought about was attachment theory, specifically the ambivalent style. Sounds like he wants attention, someone to talk to, but doesn't want to appear weak. His initial antisocial behaviour seems like it's meant to hide, to both himself and others, his inherent human need for social connection.

As for why his behaviours was as dramatic/erratic as it was, it's likely due to having impulse control issues.
Hypolite Petovan
Hypolite Petovan  
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Thanks, armchair! I agree with the need for attention (chit-chat with strangers in the subway) and the facade (loud music and public speech). Not sure about the impulse control issues, it seemed like a well-oiled routine.
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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Maybe it is. Maybe it started off as an impulse thing, but as time went on and he found himself able to feel secure and also get the connection he craves, it developed into a routine. It's his way of getting the best of both worlds. Over time, he might even chill out, and learn on his own that he doesn't have to be so on-guard, but that's not likely to happen very easily. Therapy can accelerate the process theoretically, but having good insight and a dedication to getting better is #1.
Hypolite Petovan
Hypolite Petovan  
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Thanks, this was very informative!
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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No problem! I'm always here if someone needs their brains to be examined. My butt rests firmly in my armchair throughout much of the day.

CW below

Cool fact, if you look closely at this thread, you can deduct that I'm likely a child abuse victim. I am.

Also, this is all stuff that I've learned since my first hospitalisation last year. I knew nothing about psychology before then.
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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Naturally, my mind wanders then to assuming that he may have a cluster B personality disorder (antisocial). Granted, one should be very careful when making a diagnosis, and I speak as someone who got a 5 minute diagnosis myself with borderline personality disorder, when in reality, I have a cluster A personality disorder, schizoid PD.

Cool fact, I have attachment issues too. I have a dismissive style, but get too close, and I'll actually switch to the anxious style.
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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Another thing. Attachment issues, especially as disorganised as his, a personality disorder which exhibits, though maladaptive, behaviours which have likely kept him safe in the past, all point towards a dysfunctional family, and dysfunctional families tend to reek of child abuse.
Lofenyy (moved)
Lofenyy (moved)  
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Attachment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRejV6f-Y3c

Cluster B

"Cluster B personality disorders are characterized by impulsive, self-destructive, emotional behavior and sometimes incomprehensible interactions with others."

Antisocial behaviour

"pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, lack of empathy, bloated self-image, manipulative and impulsive behavior."

Secure, Insecure, Avoidant Ambivalent Attachment in Mothers Babies

YouTube
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